The Bustonian Blog

Sep 23

The Bustonian; Your Perfect Partner?

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09 23rd, 2008| icon3

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Shannon Emerson is a friend of the Bustonian as well as a reporter for Dirty Water TV.

Enough with the wheels on the bus; let’s talk about the heels on the bus. I am talking stilettos, wedges, tall boots and pumps all belonging to the fabulous women that have been able to call the Bustonian their home for a full 6 hours. And what a place to call home, it’s shiny and pink just like the Barbie Dream house you imagined living in as a little girl. But we’re not so little anymore, we’ve grown into expert multi-tasking women. And as expert multi-tasking women, we appreciate all the commodities located right in our shiny, pink bubble on wheels. We’re going to sip on a cocktail from the built-in bar while simultaneously swinging on the stripper pole Rock-of-Love style. And speaking of Rock of Love, who needs Brett Michaels when you have a love of your own? Introducing the reasons why the bus makes a perfect partner for the night.

1. THE BUS IS HOT. Seriously, it’s noticeably attractive. It catches everyone’s eye from all the way down the street and it’s all yours….for the night.

2. THE BUS IS FUN. The lights, music, entertainment–the bus is definitely not one of those IT guys that work in the Financial District.

3. THE BUS CARES. The bus is a safe haven for those dirty dance floors come 1 a.m. It also drops you off at your house safe and sound at the end of the night. We doubt you’ll remember this part, but we promise, the reason you are waking up in your own bed, albeit the searing hangover, is because the bus loves you.

4. THE BUS GIVES YOU THE UPPER HAND. Sure, the bus does the dirty work– weaving in and out of traffic, cleaning up from the previous party and waiting outside while you bar-hop. The fun decisions? All up to you! You get all the control–you call the shots as to where the bus is going, you bring the alcohol of your choice onboard and finally, you get to make the playlist. And there is nothing a woman loves more than control.

5. THE BUS IS IN THE KNOW. The bus is like dating a party promoter minus the sleaziness and hair gel. The bus gets you front of the line service–no questions asked.

So there you have it–a big, attractive, fun, caring bus that’s in the know and will give you control. I think I am in love.

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Sep 11

The Magical Party Bus - by Peter Mckeown

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09 11th, 2008| icon3

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The Bustonian: A bus that takes you on a bar crawl and you can bring your own booze. Oh, and it has a stripper pole.

I’m not going to lie to you: When I was in elementary school, I was the man. I was on the cover of the Medford newspaper twice, no big deal. As far as a 10-year-old was concerned, I was famous, on the local level.

Unfortunately for my parents, all the glitz and glamour of being in the limelight got to me, and I decided that school wasn’t as important as Little League or paparazzi. To tell you the truth, I was a pretty bright townie, but nothing caught my attention academically. That was until I found “The Magic School Bus.”

Now, I know what you’re thinking, and no, “The Magic School Bus” isn’t a code word for the short bus that takes special needs children to school. It was my favorite book series. I mention this to you because this past Thursday night, I was on a different magical bus called the Bustonian, a vehicle that can make any young man’s dream come true.

There are many similarities between my childhood book series and Thursday’s “Gong Show”-esque bus. The Bustonian is a pimped-out school bus with limo-esque seating that provides transportation for a group of about 30 people to go bar-hopping through Boston… and you’re allowed to bring as much booze as you want on the bus. Ideal. So, as far as a 23 -year-old is concerned, the Bustonian is as magical as any bus, fictional or real.

First of all, both buses have amazing drivers. On the Magic School Bus, Ms. Frizzle (a.k.a. The Frizz) expands the minds and smiles of her students and even lets her pet lizard do most of the driving. As far as elementary school teachers are concerned, she’s really cool and reminds me of someone who did too many drugs at Woodstock and occasionally puts her class in mortal danger: all A+ attributes for someone working with children.

On the Bustonian, our driver was named Tony, and he defined cool. He didn’t even get mad at me for drunkenly calling him Tony Danza, instead responding, “You’re right, because I am the f–ing boss.” Needless to say, that one comment made Tony all right in my book, especially since he took care of every problem that arose. The only real problems we had to deal with were drinking, not pissing our pants and getting into bars. Luckily for us, Tony was from Everett, and all these issues are well within his skill set.

The buses themselves had physical characteristics that would make anyone get the chills. The Magic School Bus could turn into a submarine, a space ship and frog. It can even go back in time or be shrunken into a microscopic vehicle. Talk about versatile. The Bustonian couldn’t shrink or go into space or even go on Storrow Drive, but it had windows, seats, a mini dance floor and a stripper pole. Any bus, establishment or house that has a stripper pole automatically goes into the category of “cool.”

Needless to say, me + Southern Comfort + stripper pole + “Sexy Back” = awkwardly seductive dancing. The windows provided ample entertainment as well, either for asking for fake directions to places like “your face” or “the toilet store” or screaming “Whyyyyyyy???” or “Want a roommate sandwich?” at defenseless pedestrians.

Both of the magical buses also take their respective occupants to magical places. For instance, the Magical School Bus in one book took its children through someone’s digestive tract. Luckily for us, the Bustonian didn’t take us to someone’s large intestine or through any sphincters… unless driving through Charlestown counts. But each bar we went to certainly got the job done. For me, the bars were relatively unnecessary. I had all the booze and beers I needed on the bus, so I basically used the stops as porta-potties.

Side-note: Great call by the creator of the Bustonian to not have bathrooms, because bad things happen to drunken people when trying to use a moving bathroom.

When you really think about it, what’s more magical to a 23 year old than an alcohol-filled bus with tons of friends that provides transportation to and from home? The answer to that is not much at all, so the next time you’re thinking about setting up a birthday party or having a night on the town, seriously consider ordering the Bustonian. It’s affordable, BYOB, convenient and has a stripper pole. Who would ever need more than that?

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Jul 16

Welcome to the ALL NEW Bustonian Website!

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07 16th, 2008| icon3

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That’s right folks…feast your eyes on the all new Bustonian website! Our friends at Skeey Interactive have hooked us up with all the bells and whistles.

The Bustonian Photo Galleries

Check out our new and improved photo galleries. The night of your event, we’ll even give you an e-mail address to send pictures to from your mobile phone, which will automatically be posted on the website!

The Bustonian Blog

We’ve got a new BLOG, which is updated by our own Bustonian Blog Girls! We’ve got a bunch of Blog Girls, but there is alway room for more. Do you like writing? Like clubbing? Like getting into bars for free? All you have to do is flash our Bustonian Blog Girl Pass to the bouncers of our affiliate clubs and get VIP access. Take a few pictures and write about your night. It’s as easy as that.

The Bustonian Videos

Take some video during your event, upload them your YouTube account and tag your video with “bustonian” as a keyword. They’ll automatically appear on our Videos section of the website!

Special Offers and Discounts

We’ve teamed up with some of the best club owners in Boston to give you special discounts and promotions. Just sign up for our e-newsletter at the bottom of the page to receive e-mails with coupons. You’ve got to be a mailing list member to receive the deals.

The Boatonian

Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you’ve probably have heard that The Bustonian has headed to the high seas with our new way to party - The Boatonian. Enjoy the breathtaking Boston skyline, listen to some tunes and start your Thursday nights with a bang! Also, ladies may enter in our Miss Boatonian Dance Competition to win $200 cash every Thursday and a chance to with the GRAND CASH PRIZE on the last cruise of the summer and be crowned Miss Boatonian 2008!

The Bustonian has lots planned for the future, so keep your eye on the website for news and updates. Last but not lease - thanks for all your support in keeping the wheels rolling!